I finished! I survived! But it took an embarrassingly long time (9:42). On the other hand, many people dropped out, and I was not last. :)
Swim: The smelly pond water grossed me out, but M.H. said I was the only one in the field (of only about 40) who could swim in a straight line, so that's something.
Bike: I saw 40 mph on my bike computer, and I also saw 4 mph. The course was so beautiful, but absolutely brutal. I had to get off and walk twice.
Run: I started off slow but hopeful that I'd have legs for the second lap, but it turned into a death march. It was 95 degrees, I was all alone on the course, and I was afraid that if I collapsed from heat exhaustion it would take them hours to find me. So with all hopes of a happy run utterly vanquished, I was very conservative and didn't even try to run in the last 5 miles.
Everyone keeps asking me how I feel about the Ironman after doing this race, but I'm not in the mood to discuss it.