Thursday, September 26, 2019

It *is* harder

Tuesday: 35 minutes sitting
Wednesday: 35 minutes sitting
Thursday: 35 minutes sitting/lying down

My mind and body double-teamed me today to try to thwart my meditation. Nothing can make meditation “hard,” huh? Naive noob! Have you ever tried it with a sore back, stiff legs, AND a freaking-out-for-no-real-reason brain? Who’s calmly accepting whatever comes up now?

(I don’t know who’s supposed to be talking there.)

I didn’t have time for yoga today before meditating (people are actually expecting to be able to reach me by 9 a.m.), and I had a huge, impossible day of work ahead. Again. I sat down not realizing anything was that amiss. But then my mind and body both went berserk, and I couldn’t seem to stay either still or focused. I didn’t give up on meditating, but I did give up on sitting and finished the last 10 minutes flat on my back, which was only slightly more tolerable.

I wonder if finding time for yoga first is more essential than I thought, or if this morning was just a perfect storm? I’ve learned a couple of ways to try to work through stuff like this—calmly observe the emotions as they arise, mindfully change your position—but I don’t think my skills were quite up to what happened today.

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