Before and After

I'm still "preparing" for this primal eating challenge mostly by reading up on it (rather than doing something useful, like, say, shopping). But it is really fun to read the before-and-after stories.

As in:

"Before, I was a 600-pound "Jersey Shore" addict with rheumatoid arthritis, heart disease, cancer, and bad skin, and now, After, I'm a vibrant, healthy, 120-pound cello player with a greenhouse in my backyard and a song in my heart."

I really want to be an After. If I didn't, what would be the point? But I'm afraid my story is not going to be that great. I already have an interesting and fulfilling life. I work from home. I'm in love with and constantly amused by my family. I sleep pretty well. My skin is clear. My wrinkles are within reason. My knees are sexy. I don't have any real health problems. And I just completed an Ironman.

But a before-and-after story needs a Before, so let's focus on the negative. I need to lose 20 to 30 pounds. I am easily distracted when I should be working. I can't do any yoga pose requiring hip flexibility. I never know where I've left my keys. My STUPID FEET STILL HURT constantly. A lot of my hair is falling out. I have no desire to have an organic garden or play an instrument. My fastest marathon is over six hours. My bathrooms are dirty, despite my having the desire for them to be clean and the ability to make them clean. My mother-in-law can beat me at arm wrestling. (Well, I would never actually arm-wrestle her. But I can deduce this from the fact that she can beat my 13-year-old son, and he can beat me.)

There. The cold, hard facts. Now I have a story to tell.

But I still want this to be my Before picture: