In which I just can’t even with this podcast

I resolved to listen through my backlog of Selected Shorts podcasts this month because I thought it would be good for me to listen to something literary, and perhaps to get in touch with modern short fiction.

But I’ve run into a snag because apparently I can’t stand modern short fiction. The piece I just finished was a horror story where the villain is potatoes. I recently heard one where people can’t find their way home at night and then cease to exist because the moon has disappeared. There was a Jane Austen novel told in tweets. A history of how the United States was turned into an indoor mall by putting a dome over it. A woman who has an extramarital affair with her couch. A speech that’s just a list of funny phrases. A complaint about the packaging on a bag of frozen peas. A complaint about babies who aren’t pulling their weight in the work force. A dinner party where everybody is named Ava, Idi, or Ona.

Am I forgetting some? Yes, I am forgetting some. They are best forgotten.

I mean, I guess another way to clear out my backlog is to unsubscribe and delete, but it’s a shame, because I remember loving Selected Shorts when I was listening to it on my commute in the early 2000s. When did it get so outlandish?